Never Again: Facing the Truth to Stop the Cycle

Never Again

A closer look at the importance of introspection for lasting change This past week I’ve been flooded with memories. I’m sure it has to do with the date on the calendar. Later this month is my third wedding anniversary. And I think to myself never again.  The flashbacks aren’t fond recollections, but snapshots of painful, disturbing, … Read more

Leaving my Sex Addict & Frida Kahlo

Sex Addict Frida Kahlo

I did what she couldn’t - and have started over without him. As I wrapped up the last chapter of my memoir on being married to a sex addict, I researched one or two final facts. I entered a few words into the search bar, and a photograph popped up. Its content startled me, making me gasp. There … Read more

How to Reclaim Repressed Memories on Your Own

Repression Freud

It took patience, determination, and gentleness I stared at the blinking cursor and drew a blank as I tried to recall what happened next. This morning I had opened my Word document to start the next chapter and discovered a significant gap in recall. The particulars of this time frame had gone missing. For several … Read more

Is the One You’re Dating Emotionally Mature?

Emotionally Maturity

4 signs you’ve met someone ready to date. As I hung up the phone with this latest guy I’ve been getting to know, it hit me just how critical emotional maturity is to successful dating. Samantha Burn, couples counselor, and dating coach said in an interview that, emotionally immature people have “a ‘me’ factor over a … Read more

The Problem With Advice and What to Do Differently

Problem with advice

I know you are just trying to be helpful Everyone has an opinion. Giving advice about how to live life feels good. For those few minutes, we become an expert at something. And we are reassured that in at least one area of our life, we have it under better control than someone else. Unfortunately that … Read more

Social Distancing Isn’t New to Sexual Abuse Victims

Sexual abuse VICTIMS

A closer look at our uncomfortableness with trauma stories. I recently wrote about the personal details of being sexually abused. I felt terrified as I prepared to publish the article. How would others react to reading the brutal violence I experienced? The power of social pressure to silence Most of my life, I’ve carried a deep sense … Read more

My Struggle to Find My Voice After Sexual Abuse


Trying to re-integrate my fragmented self into someone whole. Sticking up for myself is hard. I’m still trying to find my voice. I’ve heard many women complain that they have trouble asking for what they want or need too, but it’s particularly challenging for me. When triggered, I react by becoming oddly submissive, an old coping … Read more