Want to Stop Obsessing Over Your Ex?
The truth is toxic and narcissistic relationships create an all-consuming dependency. We find ourselves sacrificing our common sense to hold onto a fragile connection, enduring a relentless barrage of criticism, and losing trust in our own feelings due to constant gaslighting.
Adding to this is the trauma bond, a kind of addiction that makes getting over the past relationship a monumental challenge.
QUESTIONS:
1. Jot down all your current obsessions concerning your ex.
2. Rate each one on a scale from 1 to 10. What do your responses reveal?
3. Identify the pain point that affects you the most. Have you been hurt in this area before?
EXERCISE:
Pen a letter to your ex detailing all your feelings — but don’t send it. This is a tool for your self-discovery.
- Are there any new realizations emerging?
- Does articulating your feelings unearth deeper layers of pain or perhaps even relief?
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Join Dr. Kerry’s groundbreaking course for just $9.99, a journey to:
-Eradicate fears and triggers that fuel your obsessions.
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Are you ready to take back your life?
Dr. Kerry McAvoy is a clinical psychologist, mother of three grown sons, writer, and author of Love You More.
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2 thoughts on “Stop Obsessing Over Your Ex”
Thank you, Kerry. I listened to practically everything by Drs. Ramani and Carter, but nothing has made sense to me like your words. The others give definitions and broad strokes, but you bring it down to everyday life. They feel remote, and you feel human. Your stories are personal and immediate. 28 years ago I divorced a freaking emotionless remorselessly abusive man after 13 years of hell. I thought if I could be a good enough wife he would love me at last. Never happened. I was left a shell of my former self, in and out of mental hospitals for years, dissociated and broken. Now I understand. Him. And me. And I am learning to be fiercely protective of my own inner and outer self and seek the truth as fervently as he sought to destroy me. I am learning to love myself at last. Thank you for your vulnerability and willingness to be real.
Thank you so much for these kind words. I’m so glad you’re finding help!