Apparently Freud got something right about the power of making the unconscious conscious I recently started dating again. This was the first time I’d dipped my toe back in the dating pool since getting a divorce. As I met a few men my age, I noticed a problem, though: instead of having feelings of attraction, … Read more
When Love is Unreciprocated As he walks out of my apartment, I vow I won’t respond to his next text. I’ll be stronger, I tell myself. I’ll ignore the deep yearning to say yes should he ask if I’m free. I’m tired of a one sided love. He’s too young for me, much too young — at … Read more
My Rediscovery of Me after a Lifetime of Being a We Embracing my newfound autonomy after divorce I awoke this morning with a big smile. Today is the day my new television arrives. I’ve splurged — kind of, but not really. It’s a 55″ OLED flat-screen TV. For most people, this purchase probably would have been a no-big-deal — a no-brainer. … Read more
The Risks of Hiding from Others Recovering from echoism, a developed adaptive response to narcissistic abuse Off to one side of the large room there’s an open seat. Threading through a group of women, I make my way to that spot. Doing this, however, is what I hate. For a moment, I’m sure every eye is … Read more
Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Can You Make Me a Match? My experience with a matchmaking service I pull up into the restaurant’s parking lot. New to the area, I’ve not been here before. I’m to meet my date in five minutes. All I know about him is his name. His first name — that’s it. A few weeks ago, I … Read more
And He Said Porn Was Not a Problem? The impact regular porn use had on my self-esteem and the health of my marriage. My stomach dropped as I read another opinion piece in defense of pornography. It warned regular pornography usage by male partners should be expected, and it excused secret-keeping. Upset female partners were characterized as … Read more
My Problem with First Dates and Fifty-Something-Year-Old Men How to improve the art of conversation A Recent First Date As I recently stepped into an unfamiliar, upscale restaurant, I smiled at my date’s choice of venue for our first meeting. He chose the perfect place to get to know someone better. The crowd was sparse for … Read more
The danger of using spiritual bypassing as a form of support I pulled up my Twitter feed and saw that one of my favorite Christian authors had just posted. She wrote, “Fear begs us to focus on our problems more than God’s promises.” Her tweet had hit too close to home as I continue to wait … Read more
An open letter to my late husband on his birthday Today is my first husband’s birthday. He passed away after a short battle with cancer June 2015. This letter is a tribute to him and to our love. Open Letter To my dearest Bradley, Today would have been your fifty-seventh birthday. Since the boys and I … Read more
No Such Thing as Being Ready While enjoying one of my guilty pleasures which is to watch a replay of my favorite television show over lunch, one of the characters made a statement that gave me pause with its simplicity and profundity. I had to repeat it out loud to hear it again. And as I … Read more
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