There’s what he says and then what he actually means You may have heard the old adage, there are plenty of good fish in the sea, when it comes to meeting available men. That may be true, but I’d like to point out that the phrase neglects to say what kind of fish. And be … Read more
She’s just another one of his victims It’s been a year since my ex, a self-professed sex addict, walked out of my life and into hers. I’ve been all over the map on how I feel about her. I’ve studied her in the hopes that I’d figure her out, fantasized meeting and slapping her, raged at … Read more
And probably you’ve done to someone you love too. “I’m sorry you feel that way,” my ex muttered, as if conceding. He quickly glanced sideways at me before looking back at the road. With one hand on the steering wheel, he slid his other into mine. I let my hand rest in his, limp and lifeless. … Read more
Contrary to popular belief, there’s less sex, not more. I used to think a sex addict’s marriage must be full of passionate adventures. My imagination pictured these couples experimenting with fun sex positions and escapades in exciting locations — like doing it on the kitchen island with plenty of whipped cream. I had no idea that it is … Read more
I don’t want to make the same mistake twice. Nearly a month ago, I stopped dating as I adjust to being divorced. A couple of times my finger hovered over one of the two online dating apps downloaded on my phone before I distracted myself with something else. The regular emails that show up in my … Read more
Accept people will come and go. Five years ago, when I lost my husband to cancer, I never could have imagined my new life. I now live in a different state and write full-time instead of counseling clients. I knew his death would bring change, just not how or in what way. I especially could have … Read more
I did what she couldn’t - and have started over without him. As I wrapped up the last chapter of my memoir on being married to a sex addict, I researched one or two final facts. I entered a few words into the search bar, and a photograph popped up. Its content startled me, making me gasp. There … Read more
I find it tiresome and disturbing. Last week I closed both of my online dating profiles frustrated with the pervasive hookup mentality . I arrived at this decision after a busy week of three first dates. Two out of the three guys wanted to see me again, so I guess you could say it went … Read more
Try subtlety instead of commando assaults. After having gone on a few dates and done plenty of texting this past year, I’ve noticed a trend. We seem to have forgotten the subtle art of seduction when it comes to online flirthing. Where’s the slow build-up of playfulness? It’s not a 50-something-year old problem either. I’ve … Read more
A hard lesson in gender communication and new relationships Until recently, I’ve mistakenly ignored one critical piece of information when starting to date someone new — and I’ve done so at my peril. I have failed to take a man at his word. I’ve made this mistake with the best of intentions, in the hopes of preserving … Read more
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